Hey, I’m Sarah Doman, it’s a tricky surname and is none of the following: Doo-man, D’man, or (my favourite) Doberman. This is how you say it- just like the word Roman by with a D. So now that’s out of the way- let’s get into it!
If you are thinking about booking me to work with you in your pregnancy or to help you with your young child, these are intense and intimate periods in our lives, so I think it’s important that we get to know each other a little better.
I have always been rubbish at keeping secrets and the best part of the work I do is I get to tell the best kept secrets in the world:
‘’There is a secret in our culture and it is not that birth is painful but that women are strong’’
‘’The first five years have so much to do with how the next eighty turn out’’
My career has been born out of two things;
Firstly, my frustration of unjustness. It’s always been with me; from when another child took my best friend’s lunch box, I stopped at nothing to return that ‘My Little Pony’ wonder back to it’s rightful owner, to running a charity pre-school reserving half of its places for the most vulnerable children and families, because quality education should be for all, not just those who can afford it.
Secondly, a love, a need, a purpose; to tell parents about the magic and wonder of birthing and raising humans, in a system where we are not given the things that we need to do this to the best of our abilities.
By doing this in a conscious way we have the opportunity to break the cycle and provide the next generation with a framework that allows them to be heard, carve their own paths and break free from the patriarchal system that children should be ‘seen and not heard’. If you have ever found yourself saying ‘’I don’t want to make a wrong choice’’, even getting food envy when you order out- you too are a product of ‘not good enough’ society. Our children are enough, you are enough. And I have had enough…
I am here to help parents get intentional and deliberate about their birth prep and parenting, because when we aren’t conscious to these processes, it can leave us doing things we don’t want to do, and even leave us and our children with trauma.
When I left the green pastures of Somerset and headed up to the Big Smoke to do my degree in Drama, little did I know the path in front of me. Whilst I love getting up on a stage and the escapism involved taking on the role of someone else (just try and stop me at karaoke!), as I learnt through my degree about using Drama as a tool for therapy, I was hooked, and so I began to use these skills in a different way.
The modules that I chose became more community based, then more child focused. When I graduated I knew this was what I wanted to pursue, and set about creating out of school projects which led me down the route of more formalised childcare. Since then I have run most childcare establishments you can think of; out of school clubs, pre-schools, day nurseries, trained as a qualified teacher, and visited Sweden to study the renowned forward thinking education system, learning how to apply those principles here in the UK. Following on from this I have gained a Post Graduate Certificate in Early Years, and gone on to lecture on the Early Years Foundation Degree.
Cut to the birth of my daughter in 2017, when things got personal.
I didn’t even know I had a choice about where I had my baby- home or hospital, or that I had choices about what kind of pain relief I could have, or even whether I had to have a vaginal examination. I did know that I was scared about birth; the media portrays birth in the most unhelpful way, stories get shared with you that build a negative reference system. I had heard about it firsthand too and following my sister’s traumatic birth, this changed the course of my birth preparation, and ultimately my career.
The way I prepared for parenthood was an awakening for me.
Once I took a hypnobirthing course myself, and applied my knowledge of the way children develop, I discovered an incredible synergy between preparing for birth and raising children. It was early on into my maternity leave, that I knew I needed to share this knowledge.
So many of my friends said; ‘’why does no one tell you how hard this is?’’ and got obsessed by development leaps, now, I’m not saying I found it easy (BY A LONG STRETCH… I’m not sure I’ll ever recover from the 4 month sleep regression!), but I did understand what was happening. This kind of consciousness grounds you when your life as you know it is turned upside down, the chaos is beautiful, but it’s chaos nonetheless.
My firm belief is that parenthood starts in pregnancy, and there are so many different facets of this journey which can be taken individually and developed. Your birth, understanding the way child development works and then there are the specifics of getting into what your family life looks like, how you operate as parents and your child’s personality which and figuring out the harmony of this can be… Sticky. Which is where the beehive concept has come from, beautifully created little segments of honeycomb that are perfect on their own, that can also be brought together to see the whole picture.
Take a look around, see where you are at with your parenthood journey and I’d love to help support you to get clearer on it, wherever you are.